Why Self Compassion helps Productivity

During times of change the key is not to force ourselves to keep ‘pushing forwards’ but to lean into our needs and ensure that all parts of us are on board.

Recently, I have been experiencing some transition-related emotions that have required stillness and space. I have felt to take some time away, to hold space for myself patiently and allow some time for processing. This has caused some inner conflict as the conditioned part of me has wanted to ‘push forwards’ and be productive, particularly given it’s the start of the year.

Much of our culture is driven by the idea of constant productivity, even in times where the body requires slowness because of the need to feel/ process experience or to adapt to change. There is a real linearity about the way we operate. I recall as a sensitive child being chivvied along to ‘dry your eyes and get on with it’ at school when in reality all I wanted to do was curl up with a book and feel/ process emotions in my own way (which was usually slowly and deeply).

At this time of immense change, there is a lot to process and there are some days where the body requires space and time to lean into grief or sadness. I am lucky that I have the kind of work/ lifestyle to allow me to do that kind of leaning and make space for myself. I do not want to be posting on social media or furthering my to do list when I have periods of feeling, sensing and moving energy through the body. I prefer to hold that space for myself and particularly for the more sensitive parts that find the transition challenging and who need some gentleness.

The patriarchal culture adopts a particular approach to growth and change. It is attained by tangible effort and results. It is measurable and based on form. We are conditioned to believe that if we do not do things on time, we will be ‘left behind’. In the new energies growth is not linear. It is not seen but felt. It is not a question of physical results but of coherence and felt expansion. When there are days that require self-care or time for emotion, growth requires care and sensitivity. It requires meeting needs and fostering self-compassion. Indeed, growth is hindered by effort or force in those circumstances.

Authenticity is the key approach in these new times. Authenticity is the ability to attend to what is arising with compassion and patience. If the bad day turns into ten bad days, authenticity would require a patient and caring approach towards self and to wait for the signal to act, which would come from an inspired place, not an efforted one.

While this may not produce the results that are required in a given timescale, the journey is not about time. It is about coherence and alignment within the self. It is about operating as a whole being. Being coherent within necessarily creates more flow and alignment of opportunity. Since we are human beings and have to bend to the rhythms and emotions of life, we can’t always fit into the required optimum state of coherence all the time. In times of change the more sensitive aspects need some patience and care so that we can take them along with us in a gentle way rather than pushing them to come when they are not ready.  

In this new era of raising our consciousness, the focus then becomes more about tending to all needs from an internal rather than from an external space. In our current society, through our relationship to advertising and external media we outsource or own needs to be catered for by consumption or external validation. In the new paradigm the sourcing of our needs comes from within so that we can resource ourselves sustainably from our own self-compassion. The starting point for this is greater development of our interoception/ self-awareness and being our own benevolent guide. Saying no to external distractions, developing self-sensitivity and giving ourselves more time before action can be the most loving and productive thing we can do. When we are ready to act anew, we do so from a place of inspiration rather than effort, so that we work with the flow of life rather than pushing against it.

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